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Monday, November 23, 2020

BREAKING -- I have another week at The Hermitage, a cottage on Lake Lemon.

For this I thank my benefactor, a person whom I believe has one of the biggest hearts in Monroe County. His patience, calmness and kindness are incredible. And I thank him publicly.


I don't like complaining. I think it is among the most useless of tasks, although I understand the psychological benefits of letting off steam.

Today, at lunch I tried to choke my way through a small bowl of spaghetti. But my appetite has gone to hell and I'm largely subsisting on cheese and crackers. I don't pick up meal at Community Kitchen anymore because I couldn't eat all the food. And I hate to waste.

I've now started waking up to dizzy spells, something disconcerting as a I sleep in a loft.

I watched as people in a newspaper interview a couple weeks ago looked at the tremors in my left hand, something that started in the last month.

My body aches from head to toe, all day long.

I'm not a doctor nor have I ever played one on TV but I ascribe it to being a big, fat ball of anxiety.

Nearly seven months of not knowing what's next have taken a toll. I can't imagine what it's like for those who have less than me. I saw three guys on a bench at Seminary Park taking slugs from a handle of rotgut vodka last week. I thought, "Do what you have to do man -- do what you have to do."

Peace and coping unto all of you my brothers and sisters.


  1. I have similar symptoms with anxiety, including light headedness, digestive touchiness, feeling tired. With age I developed high blood pressure, which left me dizzy, and causing its own set of anxiety issues because I felt lousy. I got the blood pressure under control with meds and diet. You need to figure out how much sodium (and caffeine) you are getting daily...difficult when receiving meals with unknown contents or eating on the cheap. Additionally, fast food/junk food and wellness do not equate! I discovered what we call baby dinners...Gerber meals for toddlers...low fat, low sodium (a little low on flavor). I eat them on the road...cold (can be heated). Sell for $2 each at major grocers. May not be practical on a budget but you need to get a blood pressure monitor (or go in a store that has a testing station) and see if you have an issue with blood pressure. Ideally I'd see a doctor, maybe a social agency can refer to a free place? I'd also lay off spirits, caffeine drinks as well as salty food...your body is trying to tell you something. Stay safe n' well.

  2. What he said, Rich. Sounds like a blood pressure issue, at least partially, which can flex on both physiological and psychological triggers. You are stewed in both. ER docs have to treat you. They can give you a script for something like lisinopril - which is not expensive. And I'd start back to that food bank. If you will not heed here, talk to the Kid.

  3. I have what are called non-essential tremors. It is noticeable when I try to show you a picture on my phone. You would get dizzy trying to look at it. Caffeine and stress make it worse. It's not a big deal for me as it doesn't really interfere with normal living activities. As for your diet, see if you can force yourself to eat some veggies or fruit daily. You would feel better. Speaking from experience as I am the type who would prefer to live on cheese and crackers.

  4. I agree with all the previous comments! Get your b/p checked ASAP and cut back on caffeine (green tea is a great alternative) and spirits. And eat fruit instead of crackers! Crackers are loaded with sodium, which could be causing your high b/p. Happy Thanksgiving!

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